Marni welcomes Nicole Russo to the Life Check Yourself studio. A personal stylist to high-achievers and executives, Nicole opened her own styling shopping service in 2017 and has styled thousands of people since. The duo discusses the most effective way to declutter, how to find your style and why dressing well means being empowered. How you dress, when it’s authentic, is a reflection of who you are and who you want to be.
* How to dress for power
* Avoid impulse purchases
* How to cleanse your closet
It’s Not Any Less Feminist to Dress the Part [05:11]
The way you dress impacts the way you’re perceived and the way you feel. Fashion can be wielded as a powerful tool to propel your life in the direction that you want it to go in.
You definitely need to be careful in that it has to feel authentic, or else it’s not really going to empower you. It has to feel like you in some way.
Declutter Your Emotions and Your Closet [17:27]
Your closet is a reflection of you. It’s murmurs of who you were or who you didn’t become. Or even the dreams you held on to. But, perhaps it’s time to declutter. Let go of the items you don’t wear anymore so that you can be who you are now.
Our closets are a metaphor for our life.
Get Creative [20:00]
Experiment by wearing something new each day or each week to inspire creativity. Finding your style should be fun.
I find that you get a better sense of who you are, and it becomes like a creative fun process instead of a stressful one.
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Marni welcomes Shanenn Bryant to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo discusses how to crack the control code and transform the way we view jealousy. Shanenn is a jealousy and relationship confidence expert. She’s also the host of the Top Self podcast and founder of self-development company, Top Self. It’s not just about eradicating jealousy but understanding that this feeling isn’t the problem, but rather a symptom of it. And the answers can be found by examining yourself.
* Focus on yourself
* Lengthen the space between trigger and response
* How to foster self-awareness
What’s Jealousy Got to Do With it? [05:35]
Jealous stems from somewhere internal, from a place of insecurity. And that could either be because of some type of dysfunction in your childhood or because you went through a bad experience in a romantic relationship. Either way, to understand the feeling itself, you need to look at yourself and ask the right questions.
It doesn’t necessarily have to always be that it was a cheating incident. I felt like I was insecure and jealous before that ever happened.
Make Room for Accountability [14:49]
While it may be difficult to do so in certain situations, it’s important to take responsibility rather than blame your partner straight away. Self-awareness is key.
You cannot change something that is blocking you, unless you really take a look at what you think, do, and say.
Boundaries, Boundaries, Boundaries [21:10]
Before getting into a relationship, it’s important to have an open and honest conversation about boundaries, particularly those regarding interactions with exes. It allows both partners to understand each other’s expectations.
Have that conversation to figure out what that relationship is like beforehand and then you make the decision if that’s a relationship you want to be in.
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Marni welcomes Paget Kagy to the Life Check Yourself studio. A Korean-American actress, writer, and empowerment coach, Paget is fueled by her passion for challenging societal norms. Paget, a frequency healer and spiritual coach, discusses the significance of operating from a deeper level rather than superficially judging oneself and as a consequence, others as well. The duo speak about the power of detachment and embracing uncertainty to connect with one’s higher self.
* How to dream bigger
* How to identify your blind spot
* Step out of your comfort zone
Are you Hitting a Wall? [11:04]
Energy blocks or energy patterns are basically patterns where you keep hitting up against the same situation. Sometimes, it might be different people or situations but it’s the same pattern over and over again.
It doesn’t matter what you try to do, you end up attracted to those things. And they end up attracted to you.
Un-stuck [14:12]
Sometimes, we don’t even realize that we’re stuck. And that’s the case for a lot of us. But once you identify that you are stuck, you can begin to release patterns that have been keeping you stunted.
Everything is open to us at all times.
Connecting with Yourself [21:40]
To connect with someone else on a deeper level, you need to first connect with yourself. Understand that it’s not about the outcome. It’s about you taking the necessary steps from a place of worthiness.
The universe delivers it to you in a way that you can’t predict or plan for.
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Marni welcomes Lily Womble to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo discusses what holds successful women back from truly flourishing in the dating world? Lily, who shot to fame after a viral TikTok video is the founder and CEO of DateBrazen.com. She’s helped women overcome personal obstacles to achieve confidence and whole dating lives. It’s not just about finding the right relationship but about understanding what is keeping you stagnating.
* How to live in your main character energy
* You’re not too anything
* Ask for what you want out loud
The Slot Machines of Dating [10:59]
Dating apps are built like slot machines; they’re designed to keep you wanting a little more. They give you just enough of what you need so that you come back for more.
It’s going to give you enough of the good stuff to keep you coming back, but not enough of the good stuff to get you in a relationship.
How to Really Move Forward [18:08]
Getting into the relationship isn’t the prize for healing. Healing is for you. And once you’ve done that, the relationship comes. Don’t compare your own dating life or relationship to others because you don’t know what is actually happening behind closed doors. None of us do.
The only thing separating people, I believe from finding the right relationship is giving themselves permission to want what they want.
Trust Yourself [23:44]
It seems obvious but self-trust is at the root of healing. Trust yourself to bless and release the people who are wrong for you. And don’t look back.
The more swiftly you bless and release the wrong people, the more swiftly you’ll find yourself in the best relationship.
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· The Feminist Guide to Breaking Dumb Dating Rules and Finding Love
Marni welcomes Dr.Heidi Brocke to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo delves into what being toxic actually means. It’s a buzz word that gets thrown around a lot but does anyone really know how to detect a toxic person? Heidi is a toxic relationship awareness and healing specialist. With a podcast that has over 1 million downloads, Heidi has worked with hundreds of people to help them get out of and heal from toxic relationships.
* What does toxic actually mean?
* How to decode unhealthy dynamics
* How to clean up your social circle
Narcissistic Much? [09:27]
We’ve gotten used to throwing around certain labels and terms without ever actually understanding what they mean. And that includes the word toxic and narcissistic. However, they’re different. Many actually have narcissistic personality disorders because of something in their upbringing or something in their lives that has left them with that insecurity. Knowing the distinction between a disorder and an adjective is imperative.
I chose the word toxic because it’s not a diagnosis. Toxic is an adjective. .
You Define What’s Healthy for You [14:19]
Instead of seeking validation for your decisions when it comes to who to include or exclude in your life by labeling them toxic, embrace that you have the agency to curate your own social circles. You decide who stays and who leaves. You don’t need to make excuses or throw around labels.
We’re all just trying to make sure that there’s something wrong with that person so that we can be validated in changing the relationship.
Your Normal Isn’t Everyone’s Normal [21:57]
Not everyone sees the world the same way. Sometimes when someone does something that doesn’t align with you, you’ll describe it as not being normal. It’s because that person isn’t acting like you would and as such it is out of the norm for you.
In reality, we are looking at them through our emotionally wired eyes.
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Marni welcomes Anya Chernyshova to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo delves into the process of reinvention. What does it take to completely transform your life? It begins by letting go of the negative beliefs you have about yourself. Anya, who is one of Marni’s long-time clients, went through a reinvention herself where she managed to alter her life to adapt her vision. Understanding that you actually have the power to do it is empowering.
* Don’t keep it festering
* How to let go of blame
* Forgiveness is key.
Are You Just Being Immature? [10:26]
Change begins when you start loving yourself. This mantra repeated to us over and over again because it’s true. But it’s not enough to just say it, you need to truly believe it. Let go of these negative beliefs you were told about yourself.
It’s such a different way of being when you truly love yourself.
Embracing Self-Advocacy [18:52]
Overcoming your fear and learning to ask for what you need not only helps you overcome challenges but it also fosters holistic sense of well-being. By embracing self-advocacy, you have the power to shape your career, relationships, and overall life with confidence and resilience.
Things really changed for me because I felt really powerful and I felt like I could advocate for myself.
An Evolving Soul [27:22]
Embrace life's changes, prioritize self-care, and remain open to unforeseen opportunities for profound personal and professional growth. Always listen to what your body is telling you. It knows what it’s talking about.
My body is the greatest gift that I have because she tells me when I need to pay attention immediately.
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Marni welcomes Anapaula Corral to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo delves into feminine energy, recognizing the dating mistakes and letting go of deep-rooted beliefs that may be doing more harm than good. Marni and Anapaula, who is an author, met on Instagram. After that meeting, Anapaula started doing the work with Marni and gaining insight on what it is that she was doing wrong in her dating life. The conversation between the two women explores notions of regained self-confidence, mindful dating, and the journey of self-love.
* How to define your rules
* Prioritize self-love
* How to embrace your feminine energy
It Starts with a Strong Foundation [11:07]
Regain your self-confidence through self-reflection. Recognize the trauma that you’ve been holding onto and that has been affecting your life. Once you do that, you can begin to work on it and find your way back to your self-confidence.
Deep underneath there’s a shame that needs to be healed.
Own Your Feminine Energy [15:10]
You need to fall in love with yourself in order to be able to fall in love with someone else. Open yourself up and hold on to your self-worth. That’s where all the magic happens.
Being able to sit down with my feminine energy has definitely not only changed my life, but it has improved every area of my life.
Uncomfortable Conversations [27:54]
Relationships take time and patience. It’s not always smooth sailing. It is important to have uncomfortable conversations, to be honest, and to be transparent. That is what leads to growth and ultimately a more meaningful connection.
You need the map and the person that follows the map.
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Marni welcomes Dr.Abby Mecalf to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo dismantle pre-held beliefs about the secret to a successful relationship. Abby is a psychologist and a relationship maven who also happens to be a podcast host. Throughout this episode, they look into one of the leading causes for the failure of a relationship. And it’s not communication, it’s competition that influences the dynamics within a relationship.
* Why do so many relationships fail?
* How to stop Comparing
* Find common ground
It’s Actually Not Just About Communication [06:42]
We’ve been told over and over again that the main reason relationships fail is bad communication. But there’s another cancer under that. And it's a competition.
This is competition for resources, for time, for money, for things in the family. If you’re in competition with someone, you don’t want them to win.
That Sounds Like a We Problem [12:59]
Instead of viewing an issue as one partner’s problem, look at it as a shared problem. When you do that, you both actively engage in shared problem solving. And rather than blame each other, you manage to actually find a solution that works for both of you.
Everything is a we.
Set Your Boundaries Right [28:12]
Merely expressing a preference is not setting a boundary. A boundary needs to have consequences if it is not respected. When you set a boundary, it doesn’t mean you’re more important than your partner. It just means you’re as important.
‘I feel upset when you talk to me that way.’ That’s your feeling. A Boundary has to have teeth.
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Marni welcomes Dr. Amelia Kelley to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo delves into the notion of gaslighting and how to spot it when it’s happening. Amelia who is a hypnotherapist and an art therapist, discusses the prototypes that are most likely to get gaslit. Dissecting the different types of gaslighting, she explains the personality traits that can play a role in whether or not a person will get gaslit as well as how to avoid a gas-lighter.
* How to know when you’re being gaslit.
* Stand firm in your truth
* How to distance yourself
Are You Just Being Immature? [07:18]
The term gaslighting gets thrown around lightly, and a lot. However, there are times where it is not a gaslighting situation. You’re just having a disagreement. Gaslighting is a form of emotional manipulation and abuse that is intended to control, contort and alter your sense of reality and your sense of self.
There are so many ways it can impact your self-esteem, your interpersonal relationships, your goals and just everything.
Confuse and Conquer [13:27]
Gaslighting thrives on keeping the person at the receiving end confused and doubting their own reality. Good news is the first step to avoid being gaslit is understanding and detecting when it happens. It’s about being aware of it.
Distancing yourself from gaslighting is the only true way to cut yourself off from its impact.
A Never-Ending Cycle [19:10]
One of the psychological aspects of gaslighting is that it’s a cycle that can be gratifying but it’s important to set boundaries. More so, practicing emotional individuation and not letting others rewrite your personal experiences are all steps you can take towards dealing with gaslighting.
The whole purpose is to cut down your self-esteem or your confidence. They don’t want you to have self-confidence.
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Marni welcomes endocrinologist and author Dr.Ricky Arenson to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo discuss the dynamics between men and women in a partnership. The duo delves into the differences between both genders and how the things that set them apart actually become their strength when combined. While men and women may function on opposing wavelengths, that is actually the key to the success of a relationship. And a happy relationship means a longer life. Longevity isn’t just about eating those berries and that OJ.
* Uncover your innate qualities
* Why do you keep having the same fights?
* Stop scrolling past everything IRL
Make Love Not War [18:18]
We live in a society where everyone is seeking conflict. And it’s amplified by social media. At the end of the day though, what unites us is our humanity regardless of our race or gender.
We all want to come together and see each other as human beings, and see the value and the beauty of being human rather than dividing up by race, gender, and sexual preference.
Women are From Venus, Men are From… [23:36]
The way a man and a woman’s brain function are actually very different. Whereas men tend to get hyper focused on the task at hand, women have a more diverse thinking pattern. A woman’s brain activity shows that there could be a lot going on everywhere.
Because men, when they focus on something, they become very unique, focused. You can’t distract them.
Modern Day Romance [34:28]
The issue with modern day romances is that we’ve all become impatient. We’ve gotten accustomed to just scrolling past anything we don’t like on our phone. And it seems to be a habit we’ve taken in our daily lives.
But relationships don’t work like that. Relationships are a long-term process.
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Marni welcomes Julie Hakim to the Life Check Yourself studio for a live coaching session. Julie is a physician who works at Texas Children’s Hospital. For Julie, it is vital for her to step into her power especially since she’s been struggling to feel seen recently. During the session, the duo tackle what it actually means to feel seen and how to regain control in situations that feel unpredictable.
* What’s your external avatar?
* How to be Seen
* What are energy influencers?
Are You Seen? [01:37]
When you are seen there is a sense of alignment and flow that accompanies that feeling. What are the areas in your life where you feel flow? You recognize it because it is a space of emotional safety.
I think the most immediate response is that I feel I don’t feel vulnerable.
How to Adult [06:40]
Part of becoming an adult is developing roles that you need to fulfill. Those roles differ from person to person. For some, it could be the role of a caregiver, while for others it’s the role of a friend.
Becoming an adult is reframing the perspective that one had as a child and developing into the role as I’m no longer a child, I’m no longer a teenager.
How to Prepare for the Unpredictable [11:10]
It’s difficult going into something not knowing the outcome. But there are certain things you can do to put yourself at ease when in a situation that brings you discomfort, for whatever reason. And that could be anything from not going on a date hungry to taking some space for yourself beforehand. It’s about your energy influencers and those differ from one person to the next.
For your physical self, it might be stuff like I need to make sure that I sleep or maybe hearing music to make me feel empowered.
Make a Connection:
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Life Check Yourself 436 – How to Navigate the world of relationship and dating when you’re neurodivergent with Jeremy Hamburg and Ilana Frank
Marni welcomes Friendship and Dating coaches, Jeremy Hamburg and Ilana Frank. Having worked for years towards creating strategies that empower autistic and neurodivergent adults, Jeremy and Llana give in-depth insight on the dating world. The duo has come up with a program, dubbed Social Life 360, that teaches clients to confidently meet new people. In this conversation, they touch on our basic need to connect as humans and what that really means. They delve into the struggles faced when dating and making friends as a neurodivergent person. Much of the advice is applicable to people across the board.
* How to open your mind
* Why is timing important?
* The Impact of words
Are You Rigid? [11:10]
This rigidity in thinking when it comes to dating is not just limited to neurodivergent individuals. It is something we are all guilty of. And it reduces the dating pool and with it the likelihood of success.
One of the diagrams we have in our program is a diagram that shows how limited your dating pool is when you don’t open your mind.
How to be Present [15:03]
Many of us get overwhelmed by the unpredictability that comes with dating. However, there are little ways around it that help you spend mental energy on enjoying yourself and the person rather than getting anxious. By knowing what to expect and having your date in a more familiar setting, you’re freeing up that energy to really be present in the moment.
They’re going to know the sensory impact that that date is going to have. So, they’re in control. They’re prepared.
Recognizing That Inner Critic [25:27]
That inner critic voice in your head? Don’t listen to it. It stems from a history of rejections. Many individuals, neurodivergent or otherwise, face challenges as a result of past rejections. By identifying and understanding that inner voice, you can start working on changing it and moving forward in social and dating situations.
Part of it is understanding that recognition. There’s an inner critic voice in my head that’s keeping me stuck.
Make a Connection:
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· My Best Social Life Official Website
· Schedule a No Cost Family Strategy Session
· Autistic and neurodivergent adults can schedule a no cost Family Strategy Session Here!
Marni welcomes transformational speaker and relationship coach, Stephen Muiriri to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo discusses why women feel trapped in certain relationships and how to overcome that feeling and find their authentic value. Stephen has helped thousands of women overcome dating challenges and find true love. In this conversation, he talks about the importance of finding your value and harnessing that energy to communicate it to yourself and those around you. And that value isn’t just limited to the physical, it is much deeper than that. What do you stand for? What are your values? What are your principles? That is where the beauty really is.
How to let go of the past
Rediscover yourself
Take a step back and reassess
The Sum Cost Policy [06:47]
When you continue to invest in something that is failing, the cost starts outweighing the benefits in your mind. And that’s where the challenge lies. It’s what keeps you there despite knowing better.
They think about what they have put in and what they hoped to get, they still hold on to the hope that things will get better.
Why do we Underestimate our Value? [14:39]
Most of the time, we underestimate our value and who we are as a people. But when you give yourself the value you deserve, those around you pick up on that energy.
Just being a woman is valuable enough for you to command respect.
The Life we Created is A Shield [21:24]
One of the biggest obstacles women face is their lack of clarity. Your identity is who you are; it is your values; it is your principles. To be your authentic self, you need to be clear on those values.
When you know your value, you can express it, you can communicate it. You’re not ashamed or afraid of getting rejected.
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· The I Am Factor Program: For Building Successful Relationships _Book a call NOW!
Marni welcomes one of her clients, Rebecca Purnell to the Life Check Yourself studio. Rebecca shares how she found love. Having had a fulfilling career and what she describes as a great life, she felt something was missing: she couldn’t find her person. Rebecca explains the journey she went through to find her person and the lessons that she learnt along the way. How to date on online apps? Who deserves a second chance and who doesn’t? are just a few of the questions that Marni and Rebecca discuss as they delve into the details of a love story in the digital age.
Take a step back
Ask yourself the right questions
Be curious
Define it then Tear it Down [09:52]
It’s important to look into what are the factors in your past that have created that wall around you. Before tearing it down, you must first define it. When you look into the reasons behind some of your actions, it empowers you to solve them and move forward.
When you just take a pause and find a safe container to revisit those things that you’ve been avoiding, the answer is there.
Give Him a Chance [20:27]
Maybe the first date didn’t go exactly as planned. But if you had a good feeling, there’s no harm giving the person another chance. You never know what this person might have to offer and sometimes it’s worth it.
Always give them a couple of chances based on one day.
He’s Lucky if he Gets You [26:27]
Show the person in front of you that they’d be lucky to have you because you have options. When you show your date that you’re here because you want to be and not because they’re the only person there, it makes a world of difference.
You’re not in that scarcity mentality.
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Marni welcomes strategic dating coach, also known as the OG of online dating, Mike Goldstein in the Life Check Yourself studio, where the duo dive into the male perspective of dating and what men are actually looking for when it comes to a partner. What makes them tick? How do they date? Men, like women, are looking for a safe space where they can be themselves. But what does that actually mean? Their conversation touches on cornerstones of what it means to be in a relationship and how to get there.
How to be his safe space
Speak your mind
How to date right
What Does He Really Want? [16:30]
Men want to feel needed, appreciated, and accepted. They want to show their partner off. But for each man, the definition of that varies. And that definition evolves with age as men start to look at what they really want in a life partner.
So then it’s still showing off, but it becomes less vain. And it’s what would really feel good if a woman has these amazing qualities.
Don’t be the Competition, Be the Prize [20:14]
Your partner is at work all day, fighting his own demons, dealing with his own battles and obstacles. When he comes home, he’s not looking to compete with you. He’s looking to just be with you, let his guard down, and be himself. You’re his safe space, not his battlefield.
Maybe I can be feminine with her. Maybe I’ll be masculine. Whatever I want to do in that moment, she accepts me and doesn’t make it more battle, more conflict. It’s just acceptance.
Breaks Aren’t a Bad Thing [30:31]
This isn’t a race. When it feels overwhelming or demotivating, it’s important to take breaks and just take your distance from the dating scene. Give yourself that space to get excited again.
You’re going to get someone quick when you’re in the right mindset.
Make a Connection:
· 3 Secrets Men Wish You Knew *Free Download*
· Are You Making These Unconscious Mistakes With Men? *Free Training*
· Ready To Take Control Of Your Dating Life? Book A Call With Us
· Men (Over 40) Choose Women Based on THESE 4 FEELINGS (My Best Advice)
Marni welcomes award-winning podcast host and author Damona Hoffman to the Life Check Yourself Studio, where the duo takes a deep dive into what the dating scene looks like today and what are some of the myths that need to be debunked. They delve into the importance of forging genuine connections by slowing down and reflecting on our dating beliefs. Touching on some of the misleading notions that many of us need to dismantle like the chemistry myth or the soulmate myth, the conversation serves as a new-age manifesto for how to make dating more hopeful and authentic.
Take a good, hard look at your dating beliefs
How to rewrite your own love stories
How to show up with intention
F the Fairytale [10:09]
While it may not be evident, the way we date is passed down from generation to generation. That is, the dos and the don’ts, the etiquette and all that comes with the courting stage. Take a good hard look at your dating beliefs and question them. Why can’t you send the first message? Why can’t you, as a woman, initiate things?
Now our dating pools have expanded everywhere, and yet we’re still playing by these old rules that no longer fit.
Why Are We So Obsessed with Chemistry? [18:05]
Chemistry when dating is a myth that can be damaging. Being curious about the person in front of you rather than holding on to that notion of chemistry is more likely to lead to better results or at the very least a genuine connection, if not a lasting one.
For the chemistry myth, the antidote is clear communication.
Dump the Pick-Me Attitude [23:47]
We all have this deep need to be liked, and it’s a feeling that we’re constantly chasing. It’s been aggravated by social media where we’re constantly trying to one-up each other and prove that we’re better than this or that person.
We don’t have to do all that if we are focusing on authentic connection. First of all, it’s going to be a more interesting date for you. Second of all you’re going to show up differently.
Make a Connection:
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F the Fairytale (Rewrite the Dating Myths and Rewrite Your Love Story)
Marni welcomes well-being life coach, trainer and consultant Jamie Heberlein where the duo discuss how to eliminate anxieties when it comes to dating. Having been through it herself, Jamie shares nuggets of wisdom in the form of tips that helped her break free from expectations, pressure, and disappointment when it comes to dating. Part of it is learning that one person’s reaction or action is not a negative reflection of you as a person.
· Transformation through self-compassion
· How to balance your approach to life
· Getting rid of external validation
Are You Forcing it? [10:34]
With the whole manifestation trend, it’s a thin line separating between actually putting that energy out there and obsessing over it. It’s a trap many women fall into, which only ends up making them feel worse about themselves. What happens is that you put yourself down when what you had in mind doesn’t manifest in the way you wanted.
I start going negative. So, it really helped change my mind set to say that I’m going out into the world to have experiences and meet people, and that’s kind of it.
Slow Down [14:11]
It’s sometimes a good idea to take pause when immersed in the hectic environment that is the dating scene. People often forget but take a minute to step back and figure out what are the things you’re not being true to yourself about. Give yourself permission to do the behind-the-scenes work. That’s usually the work that helps you figure yourself out.
I think the non-negotiables of what are the things that I will not negotiate just helped me ground who I am. And I think that even gave me confidence.
Switching from Subjective to Objective[22:08]
It’s the stories we tell ourselves that matter. When it comes to someone not calling us back or canceling a date, it’s important not to attach too much meaning to that. Instead, sit back and look at it objectively before thinking negatively about yourself.
It will happen when it’s supposed to happen. Trust the process. Do the steps to reach out to different guys, they reply…Or they don’t. Then they’re not my person.
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. Achieve Your Full Potential with Life Fulfilled
Marni welcomes growth strategist and consultant, Julie Pryor to the Life Check Yourself studio, where the duo discuss how to switch your mindset in a way to make it work in your favor. They reflect on the importance of accountability and that of the words we tell ourselves. Speaking about what it takes to build an impactful brand and the lessons gleaned from her experiences, Julie’s method isn’t just about the numbers.
· How to create your own results
· Trust yourself
· How to hold yourself accountable
Shifting Your Mindset [12:34]
You need to embrace all the things that make you you rather than looking for validation externally. You’re not the victim, you’re the architect of your own life. That is, things are not happening to you; they’re happening for you.
The process is about having the courage to make new choices, having the courage to ask for help, just having the courage to look within.
New Level, New Devil [19:20]
There’s this common misconception that many people hold, where they’re convinced that once they achieve a particular goal, all their problems will disappear. But the reality is that with each stage in life, there are the challenges that come with it. However, you find out through these challenges, the areas where you’re lacking in confidence and how to start working on that.
It was an energy. It was an energetic leaking. I wasn’t seeing the results that I wanted.
Do You Practice Accountability? [27:36]
While it’s not discussed as often as other key concepts, accountability is something a lot of us minimize in our lives. By learning to hold yourself accountable, you also learn to do what you say you’re going to do, when you’re going to do it.
Those couple of projects I’m procrastinating on, I bring them back to the forefront and I recommit.
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Marni welcomes power couple Mali Apple and Joe Dunn to the Life Check Yourself studio, where the trio discuss what it means to deal with jealousy in relationships. They reflect on the importance of communication and addressing the root cause of these feelings. How do past experiences and social influences play a role in breeding feelings of jealousy? Mali and Joe are award-winning authors, coaches, and best friends.
How to have an open conversation
Don’t be impulsive
What is rational jealousy?
Jealousy PTSD and Impulse Control [08:19]
There is rational and irrational jealousy. Sometimes the reason we have feelings of jealousy with a partner has nothing to do with them, and everything to do with our own past experiences. The first step, however, is to do nothing. Don’t act on impulse.
You’ve got to give yourself some time to breathe and take a look at where it’s coming from, where it’s actually coming from.
Why Are You Jealous? [14:27]
It’s important to do some self-reflection as to where these feelings of jealousy are stemming from. What are you telling yourself when you’re faced with a situation where these feelings come up? Once that’s done, it’s time to reprogram your internal narrative or dialogue.
You know that your partner doesn’t want you to be jealous and will do what they can to keep you from being jealous.
One Person’s Cheating is Another Person’s Chilling [20:19]
What is defined as cheating for one person, could be defined as harmless for another. So, it’s important to have these conversations and ask the right questions at the beginning of a relationship.
Some of these questions might determine whether or not you really want to be in a relationship or should be in a relationship.
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Marni welcomes Rachel Russo to the Life Check Yourself studio, where they discuss what it means to find your person and the importance of aligning lifestyle and vision for the success of your relationship. Rachel has been working with people to help them find love for almost 18 years. The matchmaker, and dating and relationship coach has a long history in the industry and she’s got a few gems to share on what it means to have a healthy relationship with the right partner.
What’s the deal with age gaps?
He might not be what you’re looking for
Do you have core compatibility?
It Starts with You [12:00]
It’s vital for you to know yourself before venturing out on the dating scene. What that means is that you need to figure out what is important for you, what your values are and how it is you want to spend your life.
What they really need is core compatibility on how they want to live and how they want to be in a relationship.
There Is Someone For Everyone [21:28]
No matter what your situation, there is someone out there for you. Whether you’re a single mom in her 40s or a three-times divorced woman in her 50s, there are men out there who are looking for your exact lifestyle and everything that makes you you. Don’t be discouraged by anything anyone says and don’t weave limiting narratives about yourself.
The number of kids doesn’t have to stop you. And also, being really upfront and clear [is important], like I’m not looking for a provider, I’m looking for a partner.
Be Flexible [29:07]
No one is saying compromise everything. But it’s not just about these superficial qualities you’re looking for. While attraction is necessary, and there are certain things every woman looks for to feel that romantic spark, there needs to be more flexibility.
You have to strike a balance because we do have to rule people out. But we can’t make these premature judgments, and a lot of the sabotaging has to do with these superficial things.
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Marni welcomes Heather Leick to the Life Check Yourself studio for a coaching session. Leick’s objective is to get through feelings of imposter syndrome. Heather is someone who reinvented her life after getting out of an abusive relationship and leaving a job she didn’t love to pursue one that she does. The duo discusses imposter syndrome, habit of self-sabotage and Leick’s difficulty when it comes to expressing herself.
· Why do you hide yourself?
· Where does your self-sabotaging stem from?
· What’s your central thread?
Feelings of Belonging are Natural [07:27]
Everybody wants to belong. It’s natural to feel nervous when you’re introducing yourself or presenting yourself to a group of new people. It’s normal to want to be picked and liked.
If you didn’t have that self-doubt, what would that look and feel like?
Self-Sabotage Happens on Different Levels [08:59]
When you hide a part of yourself, it’s a draining on the long run. Partial expression of yourself is not sustainable because it feels dissonant in your body.
When we don’t feel enough that we can be who we really are, we’re sabotaging on so many levels.
The Love Shield [15:05]
The love shield is this central thread that people have that is the through line within their life. When it’s used for good, it’s a super power. But when it’s used in the shadow side, it takes us away from ourselves. It’s essentially a recurrent quality or trait that you have that can either be good or bad for you depending on when and how you use it.
For me, mine is to create possibility, like I can create possibility anywhere. But also, I can create possibility when I’m fixing people who don’t need to be fixed.
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Marni welcomes Evan Marc Katz to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo delves into what dating looks like today and how to navigate it. Why do women keep falling into the same patterns? How do you tap into your feelings?
Evan is a dating coach that has helped over 13 thousand women from all over the world. Having written 4 books, he is also a successful podcast host. In tackling the topic of dating at all ages, Evan explains what it means to find your person. It’s not just about the mantras but setting an action plan.
· Stay in the game
· Seek consciousness and intention
· How to be strong universally
Stop Focusing on Landing the Man [10:00]
We always think of dating as an accomplishment. Women tend to focus on landing the man rather than looking at how they feel. Face your emotions. Ask yourself how you feel within the relationship. It’s not about the man looking good on paper, it’s about the connection that is meant to come with that.
Do I feel safe, heard, and understood? Can I relax and let my guard down, and trust that he’ll be there for me and accept me in full?
Hope Springs Eternal [17:48]
People soften with age, they get better. They’re more self-aware, more supportive of each other. Life is peppered with examples of people who found love not only in the most unlikely places but later on in life as well. And you shouldn’t lose hope but you should set an action plan.
Hope springs eternal. So, my belief is that there’s enough good guys to warrant it, especially for women of a certain age who are surrounded by people who have given up on love.
Dump the Scarcity Thinking [23:12]
Stop doubting yourself If you’ve left your partner for all the right reasons. Trust yourself and start reframing it in your mind. It’s easy to fall into that pit of self-doubt, wondering whether you’ll ever be loved this way again or whether you’ll ever be treated this way again. You will. This relationship was just a stepping stone, it unlocked something in you.
Why would you treat him like he’s the last man on earth? So many people come back to coaching because they had something that was ill-fated, and it awakened something inside of them.
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Marni Marni welcomes Dr.Diane Mueller to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo discusses sexual health, intimacy and how to get your sexy back. Dr.Diane is a podcast host who’s helped many women reclaim their vitality and jumpstart their libido. She also holds a doctorate in naturopathic medicine. Women often forget the importance of sex and the nuances that come with that kind of intimacy. However, sexual intimacy is one of the pillars for a good healthy life.
How does stress affect your sex drive?
Sex is a foundation of health
Why you should care about your libido
It’s All in the Hormones, Baby [08:01]
Stress affects men and women differently when it comes to their sex drive. Similarly, the hormones released by men and by women after being intimate have a different effect on each gender. Whereas men release vasopressin, which allows them to then become focused, women release oxytocin, which gives them the urge to be held.
What happens with stress is that stress will actually turn down oxytocin.
What’s Sex Got to do With it? [12:58]
Conversations surrounding sex and sexuality when it comes to women, for centuries, have been regarded as too taboo to talk about. It is only over the past decade or so, that these topics are being tackled more. And with good reason.
Being sexually intimate has proven to raise happiness levels and reduce anxiety. It also decreases social isolation and feelings of loneliness.
There’s some research that is connecting a proper healthy sex life with really maintaining the longevity of a happy relationship.
Be Present [19:18]
To actually enjoy pleasure means to be present in the moment. Sounds self-evident but many women will sometimes zone out during the act as their mind drifts off to the laundry list or the grocery list or something that needs to be done. And that’s because of the way the hormones released affect the brain. However, that’s a sign that you’re not in the present, that you’re not in the body.
The more we’re in that moment experiencing pleasure, the more oxytocin, the more stress resilience, the more happiness and all those things.
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Revive Your Love Live: 5 Steps to Mindblowing Orgasms and Romance *Free Ebook*
Marni welcomes Laura Foster to the Life Check Yourself where the duo discusses what it means to be in alignment with your true self by un-programming yourself. Laura has been helping women through her movement Soul Healing Humanity, and through her technique Holistic Scaffolding, to unpack their bullshit and leave it behind. The maverick, who decided to cut the bullshit out of her own life, guides her clients into doing the same and finding a massive makeshift in their physical, mental, and spiritual well-being.
How to cut the bullshit
Stop the distractions
Be there for you
Is Your Unhappiness Seeping through? [04:40]
It seems evident but looking at your happiness, or lack thereof, is the first indicator of whether you need to make a change or not. And sometimes, you might not even know that you’re unhappy. While things might look great on the outside, and you’ve ticked all the boxes for what a successful happy life looks like, what’s underneath is what counts more.
When I’d stop all the doing and the busyness, and I would start to come into alignment with my true self, it was like that’s where a lot of unhappiness is coming from.
Who is Your True Self?[13:00]
Your true self is what’s underneath everything you’ve been programmed to believe; it’s underneath everything you’ve been conditioned into thinking you need to do; and it’s underneath all the human bullshit. And as you get closer to who your true self is, you get into your power. But that’s something only you can do.
To take back your power means to live in alignment with your true self.
Be Your Own Guru [20:38]
While it is beneficial to hear out other people or gurus, what ends up happening is that you replace one set of rules and dogma with another. However, the reality is, no one knows what’s best for you more than you do.
Once you learn this framework that gets you to where you’re your own guru, then you design a life that you love by you, for you.
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Marni welcomes Gillian Pothier to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo dissects what masculine energy and maleness actually mean. Gillian is a writer, a teacher, and a mentor who has helped women create fulfilling lifelong relationships with the men in their lives. And that extends to their romantic partners, their brothers, and their fathers. Her work centers around what becomes possible when you understand masculine and feminine energy.
We need to talk about dad
How to get right with the nature of maleness
Is it time to reclaim the source of patriarchy?
Going Back to Basics [03:35]
If you’re to start fixing or developing the masculine relationships in your lives, you need to look at the source code, the first template. And that’s the father figure. Women need to look back at what’s inside their systems because we project these same wounds unconsciously over and over again.
If we’re talking about a path of repair with men in the masculine, in our lives, we have to look at the OG.
Dethroning the Father [08:19]
Women do not understand men and maleness. The reality is that so many women continue to homogenize and feminize men. We want them to be like us. It’s important to cleanse ourselves from the distortions taught to us by a culture that degrades men in the masculine.
We tend to use feminine values and ethos and morals and preferences in our relationship with men to judge them as a good man.
Tough Love [14:15]
For what has happened to you as a little girl or throughout different stages of your life, it can easily be said that it wasn’t your responsibility. But the moment it lives in your nervous system and your constellation of beliefs, it becomes your responsibility.
It’s not about blaming women though. But it is about understanding that in order to have the experience that you want, this is an invitation by life or the divine to enter into a heroine’s journey and create.
We have developed a capitalistic socio-political word called the patriarchy. But patria means family.
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Ready To Take Control Of Your Dating Life? Book A Call With Us