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The Dating Den

Each week on the podcast, I’ll be interviewing the world’s top experts in attraction, dating, communication, sex, and relationships, as well as coaching real women LIVE, through their real life dating challenges… that are probably a lot like yours!
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Now displaying: August, 2017
Aug 13, 2017

This call is a great example of when you are coming at dating from a place of self-worth and self-love it puts you in the power position.

And, it’s proof that Bumble and Tinder really work!

My client, Julie, met a great guy on Bumble. After a few weeks of dating, he asked her if she wanted to be exclusive. She has been putting her coaching into practice and has discovered that she communicates well with this new guy and he meets her boundaries. Sounds perfect right? But, Julie has some questions about meeting his children and challenges with dealing with her unresolved issues.

 

Julie Needs Support Now That Her New Relationship is Exclusive  [3:01]

Julie’s new guy is a single dad. During the first weeks of their relationship, his kids were at camp. Now that things are settling down and back to a normal schedule, plus they have decided to become exclusive, Julie wants to know how she can show up in a healthy way in this new relationship. 

Julie says she needs an emotional and physical connection from her new relationship.

 

Navigating the Family Aspect [8:57]

Julie’s new beau has been divorced for 9-months. He has made it clear he wants to be in a long-term relationship and possibly marry again.  He has also made it clear he doesn't want to introduce Julie to his 14-year-old daughter for 6-months. 

Dating in your 40’s means new relationships may come with kids. 

 

Unresolved Issues Come Through as Fear [15:06]

Julie is creating a challenge for herself. She believes she is always the last person men date before they meet “the one”. She may be injecting this limited belief into this relationship by collecting evidence that her limiting belief is right. 

By making these assumptions, Julie is putting herself into victim and is creating a barrier to fully-expressing herself. 

 

Trusting the Process [25:28]

By giving meaning to things based on her past she is staying in this story she has created. She will put this guy in the same place as the other guys which isn't fair to him. She isn’t enjoying the current moments. 

 

Julie needs to trust the process by: 

1. Accepting the facts, not the stories. 

2. Being aware of herself.

3. Making conscious choices.

4.Living in the moment, not in the past. 

 

The foundational process is to love yourself, love your life and find a guy to love.

Make a Connection:

Visit Our Website

Join Our Dating Den Facebook Community Here!

Follow us on Instagram @thedatingden

Learn how to attract your perfect equal...watch our latest training here!

Interested in working with us? Book a Breakthrough session at DWDVIP

Download a Complimentary Copy of our Book - How to Find a Quality Guy Without Going on 200 Dates

Dating Den Episode #35 with Laura Doyle

The Empowered Wife by Laura Doyle

 

Aug 6, 2017

On today’s podcast, we find out how to be free from your doubts and emotions by stripping away the story and accepting what is truly under your control. 

Luke Iorio is a Conscious Growth Strategist, a Blogger, A Podcaster and President of The Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (IPEC). I love him not only because he has been my coach for 9-years but because he is a wide-angled observer and an enthusiastic participant in the game of life who seeks to ask and answer "What's truly possible?" 

 

Why Are We Fixated on Fixing Ourselves?  [3:59]

Many women have convinced themselves that they are not whole, that they are somehow less than who they truly are. Plus, our psychology leads us towards the idea that we are not enough. It makes it hard to get through the daily stressors of life and then add dating on top of that and it can seem overwhelming. 

Fear naturally occurs in the dating and relationship process. The very beginning is riddled with judgment. We are worried if we will be rejected or if we are enough. It creates stress.  

Luke Iorio says when we interpret messages we receive from other people or from feedback from dating sites we get caught up in the stories we make up in our own heads. 

But, it’s your perception of what happened that is worrisome, what meaning you have associated with the message that is causing the stress and fear. 

We need to get out of our heads a bit and get more present to who we are with and what is going on in the moment. 

 

The Stripping the Story Tool [13:20]

Understanding and accepting that you have made up a story can help you deal with what is real, instead of what is made up about a situation. Look at the truth of the message without your added story. 

When you stay in your own story you risk closing off other possibilities of what the message could mean.  

 

A Formula to Trigger Joy [19:02]

Consider the quality of the experience and the emotions you want to feel when dating. When you get clear about what you would love your experience to include you can figure out how to incorporate this into the present moment. 

When have you felt joy or love? How did it feel? 

When you bring it up you can feel the connection again. It will surface more and more and you can decide how to bring it into the present moment. Ask yourself what questions you could ask you normally wouldn't or what stories you could share?

 

Creating a Shift in Your Conscious Choice [26:44]

All of our experiences shape the way we see the world. To be able to truly make a conscious choice is really difficult. We need to become aware how we see the world. assessment tools, mindfulness, and meditation can help us unwind the biases that affect us from seeing what is going on and affect our decision-making process. 

 

Make a Connection:

Visit Our Website

Join Our Dating Den Facebook Community Here!

Follow us on Instagram @thedatingden

Learn how to attract your perfect equal...watch our latest training here!

Interested in working with us? Book a Breakthrough session at DWDVIP

Download a Complimentary Copy of our Book - How to Find a Quality Guy Without Going on 200 Dates

Luke Iorio 

The Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching 

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