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The Dating Den

Each week on the podcast, I’ll be interviewing the world’s top experts in attraction, dating, communication, sex, and relationships, as well as coaching real women LIVE, through their real life dating challenges… that are probably a lot like yours!
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Now displaying: October, 2018
Oct 26, 2018

Ladies, learn to market yourself online and off and treat your online dating profile as your personalized dating service. Image and Flirting Coach, Kim Seltzer joins Marni to share her top tips for attracting the high-caliber man you’ve been looking for. Sexy isn’t an accident. You will want to update your profile immediately after listening to this episode!

 

Are Your Limiting Beliefs Getting in the Way of You Finding an High-Caliber Guy? [3:34]

 

There are many things women tell themselves that get in the way of them finding the right guy.

 

Do you have these limiting beliefs?:

 

  • Are you confident on the inside and you don’t think you need to worry about your outward appearance?
  • You don’t make the most of your sexiness because you want a man who wants you for your intelligence.
  • You discount how beautiful your body is by wearing clothes that are too big for you.

 

If you want to change your life then ditch these limiting beliefs and change your image. Image is — how you are perceived by other people.

 

Are you sending guys mixed messages about who you are and what you want by hiding yourself under the wrong clothes?

 

To attract a male, a sexual partner exudes a sexy, feminine image.

 

How-to Portray a Sexy Image Online [10:17]

 

A Match.com survey found that women should look directly into the camera and smile because if you look in another direction you may be perceived as aloof or bitchy.

 

Kim’s Top Tips for Your Online Dating Pics:

 

  • Have a full body shot in a dress.
  • Less is more. You are only as good as your best picture.
  • Pics should show your beautiful, feminine self.
  • Be approachable in your pics. Body language is key.
  • Consider what a guy would like.

 

At the end of the day, men love women who love themselves. So, let your best self shine through!

 

How-to Portray a Sexy Image Offline [25:53]

 

Sure sweatpants are comfy but is that what you want a guy’s first impression of you to be? Research shows that a first impression is made within 30-seconds of meeting a person. So, if you only have 30-seconds to attract a high-caliber guy what should you do?

 

  1. Wear a dress. Men love it and you will feel feminine and sexy.
  2. Wear heels. Big, chunky heels can show off your calves just as much as stilettos.
  3. Wear something that makes you feel good and showcases your best features.

 

Ultimately, you want to be the person you want to attract. If what you are doing currently isn’t working you need to change it up and marinate in your feminine.

 

If you want to find the high-caliber man you desire, make an appointment with the Dating Den experts at DWDVIP.com.  

 

Make a Connection:

Visit Our Website

Join Our Dating Den Facebook Community Here!

Follow us on Instagram @thedatingden

Learn how to attract your perfect equal...watch our latest training here!

Interested in working with us? Book a Breakthrough session at DWDVIP

Download a Complimentary Copy of our Book - How to Find a Quality Guy Without Going on 200 Dates

The Charisma Quotient Podcast

The Charisma Quotient Website

Oct 19, 2018

The Host of the New Man Podcast, Tripp Lanier joins Marni to tell us how we can finally learn how to understand men!

 

Tripp coaches people to start doing what they were put on this earth to do. He is a self-proclaimed Personal Development Jackass. He experiments with life by doing 10-day silent meditation retreats, plant medicine journeys, he designs businesses to support a simple lifestyle and he is in connection with really important people!  He imparts the truth today so listen up ladies.

 

Why Do We Still Act Like Children When We Should Be Mature by Now? [3:19]

 

The acting like a child mentality is not specific to men, women can be guilty of this too. It stems from our childhoods. We come into this world completely helpless. Someone else nurtures us when we cry, bitch and moan. And, some of us never get past that. This is why Tripp is on a mission to make people aware of this trap as he offers advice on how to pull them out of it.

 

If this is a pattern we all fall into, how do we recognize it and snap out of it? Tripp says, taking full responsibility for our own actions based on the kind of relationships we want can be a big step in the right direction. The hard part for most people is they attract a certain type of person based on the type of person they are. If you attract someone who needs fixing, you may have a need to be in control. If you want to attract the kind of person you desire in your life you may need to open up and be vulnerable.

 

Do Quality Guys Wait Around for a Woman to Open Up and Be Trusting? [10:51]

 

Men find walled-up women painful to be with. It doesn't feel good to them to be with someone whose heart is closed. Only guys looking for a project will date fixer-uppers,  the rest will go home with the fun, flirty type of girl.

 

When dating, are you being playful, accessible, and do you take risks? Or, are you trying to be safe and control the situation?

 

Just be yourself is age-old and sage advice but it’s the best way to enter a relationship.

 

Is He Relationship Ready? [17:32]

 

There is no telltale sign that a guy is ready for a relationship. Tripp says when the dynamic is right then a guy is ready. It's not aforethought. He doesn't think "OK, today I will find someone to have a relationship with."

 

Men want to be loved and appreciated for who they truly are. And wants to feel alive in a relationship.

 

Why Do Men Ghost or Refuse to Commit?  [21:52]

 

Men are humans and as humans, they fear discomfort and pain. When faced with an uncomfortable task, like calling someone to say they are not interested, they avoid it. That is why men ghost.

 

There is no winning when we make assumptions about someone.

 

If your guy refuses to commit or never brings the subject of commitment up, Tripp says he probably just doesn’t like you enough to commit.

 

Ladies, don’t block yourself from having a great man by putting him in a box before you really get to know him.

 

Make a Connection:

Visit Our Website

Join Our Dating Den Facebook Community Here!

Follow us on Instagram @thedatingden

Learn how to attract your perfect equal...watch our latest training here!

Interested in working with us? Book a Breakthrough session at DWDVIP

Download a Complimentary Copy of our Book - How to Find a Quality Guy Without Going on 200 Dates

Tripp Lanier

The New Man Podcast

Oct 12, 2018

Marni welcomes Tiffany into the Den to get some guidance on how to step up her dating game and to let go of the anxiety dating a new guy brings into her life. Tiffany shares the personal details of her latest encounter with a guy she has been dating for three weeks.  

 

Ladies, if you have any anxiety around dating this call is an important one. It can help you step out of old patterns and find the right guy for you.  

 

Is This Guy Just Like Every Other Guy? [2:06]

 

The guys Tiffany normally dates follow a similar pattern. They are hot and heavy and make it all about her early on and then they back off without her knowing why. The guy she is currently dating has just backed off after she sent a text questioning his interest. When he didn't respond in the way she wanted, she started worrying that he was about to back off too.   

 

Could This Have Something To Do with Me?  [8:00]

 

First things first, remember ladies it is always about you and not about the guy. Tiffany is replaying a childhood issue of abandonment over and over again in her relationships. When she is single she is fine and can take care of herself, but when she starts dating she is triggered and gets anxious,because she isn’t in 100% control of what is going to happen.

 

In general, if a guy thinks he is responsible for someone else’s self-love and emotional wholeness he’s going to back off.

 

Until we deal with our core abandonment issues we should pull a ‘Costanza’ and do the opposite of what first comes to our mind.

 

When you feel yourself drift into scared and anxious:

 

  1. Instead of being mean to yourself, talk to your little girl and talk yourself through your feelings.
  2. Realize that one person not texting back or showing up has nothing to do with why you are feeling anxious.
  3. Pivot away from taking control of the relationship and instead take care of yourself.

 

Men say what they mean and mean what they say so listen to them when they talk to you.  

 

Takeaways & Next Steps for Tiffany [24:37]

 

Now that Tiffany realizes she may be reliving her childhood abandonment issues in her dating life, she can take the steps to heal and start to finally attract a different type of guy.

 

Marni gives her strategies for sending healthy text messages and inquiries if a future guy starts to ghost her or if she just feels as if the relationship isn’t giving her what she wants for her life.

 

Tip: If a man gives you a disclaimer, listen to him. He means what he says!

 

Make a Connection:

Visit Our Website

Join Our Dating Den Facebook Community Here!

Follow us on Instagram @thedatingden

Learn how to attract your perfect equal...watch our latest training here!

Interested in working with us? Book a Breakthrough session at DWDVIP

Download a Complimentary Copy of our Book - How to Find a Quality Guy Without Going on 200 Dates

Shola Kaye Website

Oct 5, 2018

Marni welcomes Communications Expert Shola Kaye into the den to share her personal experience of overcoming fear and quietness to become a communications coach, public speaker, and professional singer.

 

Shola’s work has been featured in Harper’s Bazaar, Marie Claire, Forbes, and on the BBC. Her mission is to help women become powerful communicators, build businesses, careers, and relationships using speaking as a tool. She is the author of How to Be A D.I.V.A. at Public Speaking and her new book, Speak Up on the Spot.   

 

Shola’s Personal Development Journey [3:01]

 

Shola had always viewed herself as an introvert. Originally from the UK, she found herself working as an Account Manager in the US. She knew she was quieter and always felt tongue-tied as compared to her US colleagues. She didn't have the confidence to share her ideas. And, in our show and tell society people who don't speak up can get lost, or hide. When she was let go from a temporary contract job because of her communication skills, she knew it was time to go on a personal development journey.   

 

Shola’s quiet demeanor even impacted her dating. Guys just assumed that because she was quiet she didn't have an opinion. Her relationships would normally end with her blowing up because she was offended by something a guy did when she had never told him it bothered her.  

 

If Shola’s story resonates with you, know that you can be empowered to become an effective communicator.  

 

The D.I.V.A. Framework  [8:30]

 

In her book, How to Be a D.I.V.A. of Public Speaking, Shola created a framework to help women know when they may be over or under sharing.

 

Dynamic

Inspiring

Valuable

Authentic  

 

Shola says some people have difficulty being dynamic in their communications because they fear of being judged or they fear not getting the response they intended to get.

 

To be more engaging and dynamic practice interacting with people more. If it’s a presentation at work, ask questions from the group. If you are on a date, be playful and ask light-hearted questions. In both cases, a little bit of humor can go a long way.

 

Flex your communication muscle by doing one thing every day to get you out of your comfort zone.  

 

How to Overcome Fear & Be Your Authentic Self [18:36]

 

Shola works with clients to understand fully who they are, what they can be, and how they can be ‘that’ in any situation. She says it’s important to be proactive about who you can be.

 

She created the 10-10-10 exercise to help get women out of their negative self talk. Do this when you start falling into negative thinking:

 

  1. Write down a negative statement about what could happen in a given situation.
  2. Write down a neutral statement about what could happen in the same situation.
  3. Write a positive statement about what could happen in that situation.
  4. Now focus on the positive statement and release those negative thoughts!

 

Tip: Stuck in your head? Squeeze your butt cheeks together to bring you back to the present and slow your thoughts down!

 

How to Be a Good Communicator & Stay in Your Feminine [22:34]

 

In the workplace, many women believe that in order to compete they need to stay in their masculine but in dating this can lead to disaster. Men are with women for the softness. If we are tough all the time it makes it difficult for a man to take the masculine role and really care for us.

 

To exhibit your softer side, two good habits are:

 

  1. Let other people speak first and really listen and acknowledge them before sharing your perspective.
  2. When asking someone for something you want be sure not to assign blame and don't create drama when you react to something.

 

Make a Connection:

Visit Our Website

Join Our Dating Den Facebook Community Here!

Follow us on Instagram @thedatingden

Learn how to attract your perfect equal...watch our latest training here!

Interested in working with us? Book a Breakthrough session at DWDVIP

Download a Complimentary Copy of our Book - How to Find a Quality Guy Without Going on 200 Dates

Shola Kaye Website

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