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The Dating Den

Each week on the podcast, I’ll be interviewing the world’s top experts in attraction, dating, communication, sex, and relationships, as well as coaching real women LIVE, through their real life dating challenges… that are probably a lot like yours!
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Now displaying: September, 2019
Sep 27, 2019

Do you pick up on subtle clues others don’t seem to notice? Can you tell by someone’s facial expression what they are thinking? Have others asked you why you are so sensitive? If so, you may be a Highly-Sensitive Person or HSP.

 

Marni welcomes the Host of Unapologetically Sensitive, Patricia Young. She is a Highly-Sensitive Person who helps HSPs turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. She is passionate about educating them about the amazing gifts they have to offer via online coaching. Her work focuses on building communities, setting boundaries, and being mindful. During this episode, she offers tips for HSPs who are navigating the dating world or are in relationships.

 

Key Takeaways:

  • ● The four characteristics of an HSP
  • ● How an HSP can embrace their strengths
  • ● Dating as an HSP or dating an HSP
  • ● How to get clear on your core values
  • ● Seeing the red flags of Narcissism
  • ● Long-term relationships with an HSP
  • The Four Characteristics of a Highly-Sensitive Person [3:01]
  • Being a highly-sensitive person is more than being emotional or sensitive. If you feel like a misfit or a disruptor in your family, you may be an HSP. You may pick up on things that other people don't. Or track or pay attention to things other people don't.
  • Do you have these four traits? 18-20% of the population DOES.
  • Depth of processing
  • Overstimulation or over-arousal
  • Emotional responsiveness or Empathy
  • Sensitive subtleties 
  • Introversion and highly-sensitive are not necessarily correlated but can overlap. Sensitivity is not always valued and often HSP’s bury it.
  • Dating and Relationships for HSPs [14:16]
  • If you are clear about what the values are that you want in a partner then you will embrace someone's sensitivity. It's not uncommon that the things we love about our partners are also the things that drive us crazy.
  • If you meet someone or have someone that is very compassionate and understanding they may not be assertive or alpha but they have strengths of a different nature. HSP’s can be healers, justice makers, or creatives.
  • Get clear on your core values!
  • We often pick partners that have a piece that helps us heal and we help them heal in areas we rub each other.
  • Beware —Narcissists are drawn to HSP's as they need someone to feed their ego. HSP's read other people and know what everyone else needs. If you know what the red flags of a narcissist are as soon as you see them say, ”I'm out of here”.
  • Make a list of what your ideal date would look like.
  • Tips for Highly-Sensitive People [19:43]
  • The longer HSP's are in environments that don't work for them the more they might get overstimulated. They may need a longer time to recharge. Often, they stretch beyond what is comfortable when they are trying to please others.
  • If an HSP has experienced trauma it can make them feel that they are not enough and not lovable. They may not like their sensitivity and feel as though their feelings run them all over the place. Therapy and coaching can help.

 

Make a Connection:

Visit Our Website

Join Our Dating Den Facebook Community Here!

Follow us on Instagram @thedatingden

Learn how to attract your perfect equal...watch our latest training here!

Interested in working with us? Book a Breakthrough session at DWDVIP

Download a Complimentary Copy of our Book - How to Find a Quality Guy Without Going on 200 Date

Patricia Young LCSW Website

Sep 20, 2019

Are you notorious for not taking care of yourself? How often do you take five minutes and check-in with yourself to make sure your needs are being met? Marni welcomes Health and Wellness Expert, Aimee Raupp into the Den to talk about self-worth, self-love, weight, and self-care.

 

Aimee is a licensed acupuncturist and herbalist in Manhattan who offers fertility treatments and care. She has a Biology Degree and a Masters in Chinese Medicine from Rutgers - She has a beauty care line and she’s been on the View. Today we talk about all of her books including Chill Out and Get Healthy. Yes, You Can Get Pregnant, and Body Relief.

 

Key Takeaways:

  • ● The importance of celebrating yourself
  • ● What optimal health looks like
  • ● How to focus on you
  • ● Why you should quit beating yourself up
  • ● How to stop Self-sabotaging behaviors
  • ● The menopause-mindset connection
  • ● How chemicals affect a woman’s hormone levels
  • ● How to bring vitality back to sex
  • The Picture of Optimal Health [2:29]
  • Aimee says optimal health is easy to identify “it’s when you wake up feeling refreshed and excited about your day. You have healthy bowel movements and vitality on every level. You feel really alive and really happy in your body.  You feel like you are living your purpose”.
  • If you’re not there yet, it’s ok. Change is hard for some people. If you find yourself arguing in favor of your limitations or arguing to keep your life exactly how it is you may not be ready to shift your life. If it's not for you right now, give yourself time to step into your self-worth.
  • Takeaway: If you are going to indulge, enjoy it. Don’t beat yourself up over it.
  • The Advanced Move Toward Vitality [12:41]
  • Aimee recommends focusing on the things that are going right. You have to celebrate the wins in life. Gentle reminders about how great you are go a long way. Chill out and check-in time is when you take 5-10 breaths and ask yourself a couple of simple questions. Try asking “how are you today?” It slows you down for a minute and makes sure you are considering your needs.
  • If you are someone who is already meditating, doing yoga, and living clean but you still have bowel problems or are concerned about fertility you may be constipated emotionally.
  • Takeaway: Chill Out and Get Healthy!
  • Mindset, Menopause, Sex, and Skincare [20:14]
  • Current research shows that our thoughts, beliefs, and mental disposition has just as much as an impact on our biochemistry and physiology as does our actual biology. It’s about 50-50.
  • Take a look at yourself in the mirror every day and find one thing that you like about yourself. Think about what makes you feel good. Add a little vitality to your appearance by wearing a bright color. Dive into your divine feminine energy. Simple things make a big impact. Be alive! Don't wait to lose 10 pounds to wear the outfit you love, don't put your life on hold, and don't beat yourself up. Celebrate where you are.
  • When your internal stuffing is radiant your external package will be too. Aimee couldn't find skincare products without chemicals. So, she created her own.  Her motto is 'if you can't eat it you shouldn't put it on your skin'. It’s basically skin care for hormone harmony.
  • Takeaway: Everything you put on your skin gets absorbed into your bloodstream. It really does impact you hormonally.

 

Make a Connection:

Visit Our Website

Join Our Dating Den Facebook Community Here!

Follow us on Instagram @thedatingden

Learn how to attract your perfect equal...watch our latest training here!

Interested in working with us? Book a Breakthrough session at DWDVIP

Download a Complimentary Copy of our Book - How to Find a Quality Guy Without Going on 200 Dates

Aimee Raupp Website

Fertility Quiz

Sep 13, 2019

Marni and Chris are back this week to extract the real-life dating lessons from the reality TV show Bachelor in Paradise. The cast of men and women in the show may be given direction in which conversations to have but how they respond is very telling. Take a deep dive into the show to better understand the intentions behind mature and immature dating techniques and find out the questions you should be asking in your relationships. 

   

 

Key Takeaways: 

 

  • Why it’s important to have the “Are we on the same page?’ conversation. [1:56]

 

  • How vulnerable conversations build intimacy in relationships (Katie). [8:07]

 

  • Ask the broader question instead of feeding a man the words you want to hear (Nicole). [11:23]

 

  • Being authentic even when you are not on the same page but stay in the conversation to get feedback (JPJ). [17:28]

 

  • The best follow up question of all time and breaking your addiction to hunters (Deaniebaby). [24:42]

 

  • Why getting your heart broken often ends up for the best. (Connor). [34:02]

 

Make a Connection:

Visit Our Website

Join Our Dating Den Facebook Community Here!

Follow us on Instagram @thedatingden

Learn how to attract your perfect equal...watch our latest training here!

Interested in working with us? Book a Breakthrough session at DWDVIP

Download a Complimentary Copy of our Book - How to Find a Quality Guy Without Going on 200 Dates

I Suck at Dating Podcast 

Addicted to Drama with Sherrie Toews Podcast

Sep 6, 2019

What can you learn about the male-female dating dynamic by watching Bachelor in Paradise? Loads. To break down key lessons from the reality TV show about new and budding relationships, Marni welcomes Man Panelist, Chris Gillis back into the Den. Chris and Marni dissect how normal people tackle relationships in the craziest of ways.   

 

Key Takeaways:

  • ● Why women need to recognize their value
  • ● Men don’t want to be changed
  • ● Characteristics of the new modern-day alpha male 
  • ● When it comes down to it, women don’t often choose the nice guy
  • ● How women can honestly communicate their feelings without killing a relationship
  • ● The power a woman has over a man
  • ● Men are attracted to feminine women
  • Dating ‘the Player’ [1:44]
  • Dean, affectionately called Deaniebaby, is super handsome and he knows how to make a girl feel special. The issue with Dean is that he has a reputation as a player. So, what if you were dating a Deaniebaby in real life?
  • Signs a guy is not looking for a serious relationship:
  • ● They tell you using phrases like ‘it’s not you it’s me’
  • ● Your friends are telling you to be careful
  • During the show, the dynamic between Dean and Caelynn is all about Caelynn not understanding her value. She basically tells Dean how needy she is and you can see him pull away. Good thing for her Dylan was waiting in the wings.
  • Takeaway: Your job isn’t to change a guy. Why are you not being a woman of value? Men run away from women who want to change them.
  • Why Test a Great Guy? Just Be Honest [13:44]
  • Is Katie sabotaging any chance she has for a relationship? “When a guy tells you something he says what he means. There normally aren’t any hidden messages,” Chris says. For Katie to continue asking Chris if he is sure is her way of putting up a wall and all Chris hears is double talk. It is confusing.
  • Takeaway: Guys like a safe bet. Mixed signals confuse them.
  • Ladies if you are dating someone worth it you can't mess with them because another girl is going to swoop in to take your place. Tayshia’s treatment of JPJ is an example of this.
  • Takeaway: If you are not sure about someone or are not ready to commit, instead of planting a seed about someone better — communicate with them and tell them you are not ready to be exclusive.
  • The Modern -Day Alpha Male [22:47]
  • Women say it all the time ‘I want an alpha male’ but what does it really mean? Is it aggressive? It is assertive? If that type of behavior isn’t in alignment with who the guy really is do you really want him to change?
  • Nicole tells the handsome, buff, manly Clay he needs to be more aggressive. Then, she follows it up by going out with Mr. Machismo, who eventually got in a fistfight. She realizes she wants a guy who is assertive, not aggressive.
  • Takeaway: A modern alpha guy is more than just muscles and money. He is assertive and can articulate his feelings.

 

Make a Connection:

Visit Our Website

Join Our Dating Den Facebook Community Here!

Follow us on Instagram @thedatingden

Learn how to attract your perfect equal...watch our latest training here!

Interested in working with us? Book a Breakthrough session at DWDVIP

Download a Complimentary Copy of our Book - How to Find a Quality Guy Without Going on 200 Dates

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