In this new series of Life Check Yourself, Marni divulges the tips and tricks for professional, successful women to optimize the big work, big life balance. In this episode, the life coach discusses what to do when you feel stuck, whether it’s at work, in a relationship, or in a personal project. Many women feel frustrated when they find themselves unable to achieve a certain goal, and the advice given to them is to work harder. But what if that is not the right advice? In this episode Marni delves into why strategy isn’t the be all and end all of achieving your dreams. It is more about mastering your inner game.
Takeaways from this episode:
- Why overworking yourself is not the answer
- Stop Trusting the external
- Have you been asking yourself the wrong questions?
Why Aren’t the Results Matching Your Intentions? [00:20]
On a professional, as well as a personal level, many women end up feeling frustrated after having put in so much effort and so much of themselves into a certain goal that didn’t yield the results they were expecting. What usually ends up happening is they automatically decide to work harder, and put in twice as much effort. But sometimes working too hard might actually be moving them further away from the answers they need to succeed.
Women, especially, have this built-in wiring and programming that the more that we do (for other people), the more that we shine, the more that we show how great we are, the more we perfect, the more we deliver then we will get noticed for that.
Look in the Mirror [ 07:40]
When things don’t go your way, remove your focus from the external and look inwards. In order to achieve your dreams, you need to be brutally honest with yourself. Rather than focus on strategy, look internally for the answers as to why you are stuck in a certain situation.
Ask yourself the questions that matter instead of diminishing yourself, and laying blame on yourself. Because what doesn’t move you closer to the answers you need to succeed, moves you further away.
What is it that I am pretending not to know in order for me to have the problem I think I have?
Are You Aligned With Your Goals? [12:30]
To succeed, you need to be emotionally-connected to what you are doing, whatever that is. Look at your heartset and your mindset because things fall into place when your authentic self is in alignment with your goals.
There is a difference between what you should do and what you want to do. It’s a trap that a lot of people fall into as they scramble to do what they think is expected of them. However, it is more important for you to do what resonates with you on an internal level.
There are shoulds that are pre-programmed in that are distracting them. They’re working on these things that they think they should do, rather than the things that are really connected to their heartset.
Make a Connection:
Marni welcomes Kim DeYoung in the Life Check Yourself studio, where they discuss the fear that comes with making choices. The duo delve into the ways with which to overcome that indecision that paralyzes a lot of men and women when faced with an important decision. Kim is an entrepreneur, choice coach, and the author of The Book of Choice. She has had over two decades of experience in helping entrepreneurs and individuals make meaningful choices that help them bring their ideas and dreams to life.
Takeaways from this episode:
- Let go of fear
- A lot of it is about consciousness
- What is the choice mapping process?
You Control All Your Choices [06:55]
Everybody has to make choices. It's unavoidable, and we’re making thousands of them a day whether we realize it or not. It is important to realize that you have agency and control over your choices. Even when it is something that is out of your control, your agency lies in how you choose to react to it. The key is to find where in that choice you actually have control.
Many of us have been conditioned into thinking that we can’t make a choice due to past experiences among other things. Release that limiting belief.
We sit in a story about who we were, how we were labeled. All of those stories, if we don’t consciously work to get rid of them or remarry them, affect how we show up and how we make choices.
The Choice Mapping System [11:28]
It is important to capture the important internal dialogue for yourself. In noting down your choices and keeping track of them, you are able to learn and grow.
In every choice, whether a positive or negative outcome, there is something to be learned. It is always unfolding for you even when sometimes it doesn’t feel good.
For better or for worse, all the choices we make are unlocking a treasure trove.
A Leap of Faith [17:56]
It is almost like a tug war where on the one hand your fear is holding you back but on the other hand what is possible is pulling you into the future. But pushing forward requires a sense of awareness, consciousness and alertness. It starts by doing the work on yourself and showing up for yourself.
Step into what’s possible to let go of the fear of what’s there.
Make a Connection:
- 3 Secrets Men Wish You Knew *Free Download*
- Follow us on Instagram @marnibattista_
- Kim DeYoung's book: The Book of Choice
- Kim DeYoung’s FREE 5 Questions to Ask Before Making a Choice