Marni welcomes Dr.Abby Mecalf to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo dismantle pre-held beliefs about the secret to a successful relationship. Abby is a psychologist and a relationship maven who also happens to be a podcast host. Throughout this episode, they look into one of the leading causes for the failure of a relationship. And it’s not communication, it’s competition that influences the dynamics within a relationship.
* Why do so many relationships fail?
* How to stop Comparing
* Find common ground
It’s Actually Not Just About Communication [06:42]
We’ve been told over and over again that the main reason relationships fail is bad communication. But there’s another cancer under that. And it's a competition.
This is competition for resources, for time, for money, for things in the family. If you’re in competition with someone, you don’t want them to win.
That Sounds Like a We Problem [12:59]
Instead of viewing an issue as one partner’s problem, look at it as a shared problem. When you do that, you both actively engage in shared problem solving. And rather than blame each other, you manage to actually find a solution that works for both of you.
Everything is a we.
Set Your Boundaries Right [28:12]
Merely expressing a preference is not setting a boundary. A boundary needs to have consequences if it is not respected. When you set a boundary, it doesn’t mean you’re more important than your partner. It just means you’re as important.
‘I feel upset when you talk to me that way.’ That’s your feeling. A Boundary has to have teeth.
Make a Connection:
· 3 Secrets Men Wish You Knew *Free Download*
· Are You Making These Unconscious Mistakes With Men? *Free Training*
· Ready To Take Control Of Your Dating Life? Book A Call With Us
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Marni welcomes Dr. Amelia Kelley to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo delves into the notion of gaslighting and how to spot it when it’s happening. Amelia who is a hypnotherapist and an art therapist, discusses the prototypes that are most likely to get gaslit. Dissecting the different types of gaslighting, she explains the personality traits that can play a role in whether or not a person will get gaslit as well as how to avoid a gas-lighter.
* How to know when you’re being gaslit.
* Stand firm in your truth
* How to distance yourself
Are You Just Being Immature? [07:18]
The term gaslighting gets thrown around lightly, and a lot. However, there are times where it is not a gaslighting situation. You’re just having a disagreement. Gaslighting is a form of emotional manipulation and abuse that is intended to control, contort and alter your sense of reality and your sense of self.
There are so many ways it can impact your self-esteem, your interpersonal relationships, your goals and just everything.
Confuse and Conquer [13:27]
Gaslighting thrives on keeping the person at the receiving end confused and doubting their own reality. Good news is the first step to avoid being gaslit is understanding and detecting when it happens. It’s about being aware of it.
Distancing yourself from gaslighting is the only true way to cut yourself off from its impact.
A Never-Ending Cycle [19:10]
One of the psychological aspects of gaslighting is that it’s a cycle that can be gratifying but it’s important to set boundaries. More so, practicing emotional individuation and not letting others rewrite your personal experiences are all steps you can take towards dealing with gaslighting.
The whole purpose is to cut down your self-esteem or your confidence. They don’t want you to have self-confidence.
Make a Connection:
· 3 Secrets Men Wish You Knew *Free Download*
· Are You Making These Unconscious Mistakes With Men? *Free Training*
· Ready To Take Control Of Your Dating Life? Book A Call With Us
· Gaslighting Recovery for Women *Get a copy Now!*
Marni welcomes endocrinologist and author Dr.Ricky Arenson to the Life Check Yourself studio where the duo discuss the dynamics between men and women in a partnership. The duo delves into the differences between both genders and how the things that set them apart actually become their strength when combined. While men and women may function on opposing wavelengths, that is actually the key to the success of a relationship. And a happy relationship means a longer life. Longevity isn’t just about eating those berries and that OJ.
* Uncover your innate qualities
* Why do you keep having the same fights?
* Stop scrolling past everything IRL
Make Love Not War [18:18]
We live in a society where everyone is seeking conflict. And it’s amplified by social media. At the end of the day though, what unites us is our humanity regardless of our race or gender.
We all want to come together and see each other as human beings, and see the value and the beauty of being human rather than dividing up by race, gender, and sexual preference.
Women are From Venus, Men are From… [23:36]
The way a man and a woman’s brain function are actually very different. Whereas men tend to get hyper focused on the task at hand, women have a more diverse thinking pattern. A woman’s brain activity shows that there could be a lot going on everywhere.
Because men, when they focus on something, they become very unique, focused. You can’t distract them.
Modern Day Romance [34:28]
The issue with modern day romances is that we’ve all become impatient. We’ve gotten accustomed to just scrolling past anything we don’t like on our phone. And it seems to be a habit we’ve taken in our daily lives.
But relationships don’t work like that. Relationships are a long-term process.
Make a Connection:
· 3 Secrets Men Wish You Knew *Free Download*
· Are You Making These Unconscious Mistakes With Men? *Free Training*
· Ready To Take Control Of Your Dating Life? Book A Call With Us
· Discover the Secret to a Happy Life
· Women Are Superior To Men- Get your copy of this Book Now!
Marni welcomes Julie Hakim to the Life Check Yourself studio for a live coaching session. Julie is a physician who works at Texas Children’s Hospital. For Julie, it is vital for her to step into her power especially since she’s been struggling to feel seen recently. During the session, the duo tackle what it actually means to feel seen and how to regain control in situations that feel unpredictable.
* What’s your external avatar?
* How to be Seen
* What are energy influencers?
Are You Seen? [01:37]
When you are seen there is a sense of alignment and flow that accompanies that feeling. What are the areas in your life where you feel flow? You recognize it because it is a space of emotional safety.
I think the most immediate response is that I feel I don’t feel vulnerable.
How to Adult [06:40]
Part of becoming an adult is developing roles that you need to fulfill. Those roles differ from person to person. For some, it could be the role of a caregiver, while for others it’s the role of a friend.
Becoming an adult is reframing the perspective that one had as a child and developing into the role as I’m no longer a child, I’m no longer a teenager.
How to Prepare for the Unpredictable [11:10]
It’s difficult going into something not knowing the outcome. But there are certain things you can do to put yourself at ease when in a situation that brings you discomfort, for whatever reason. And that could be anything from not going on a date hungry to taking some space for yourself beforehand. It’s about your energy influencers and those differ from one person to the next.
For your physical self, it might be stuff like I need to make sure that I sleep or maybe hearing music to make me feel empowered.
Make a Connection:
· 3 Secrets Men Wish You Knew *Free Download*
· Are You Making These Unconscious Mistakes With Men? *Free Training*
· Ready To Take Control Of Your Dating Life? Book A Call With Us